Don’t Worry, Your Kid Is Not Possessed By A Demon.

Photo by ark.

I’ve been really quiet lately (as you may have noticed).  Not because I don’t have anything to write (because I do), but honestly, by the time I’m done working (on my computer nonetheless) the last thing I feel like doing is writing anything more.  And so, I get quiet.

I’ve had so many topics run through my head these last few days….the DietBet (lost a pound-yay!), Angel being adopted, how quickly my kids are growing, date night with Super Dad…..so many things.  It’s hard to pick just one.  But tonight I want to share a story.  And it’s name is…

Don’t Worry, Your Kid Is Not Possessed By A Demon 

When Ultra G was about the age of 18 months – 2 years old, I heard wonderful stories of how this was supposed to be the most amazing time EVER.  We would read stories and sing songs and make crafts with paint and glue and glitter and none of it would (magically) get on anything except the intended target.  Oh, the bliss!  Oh, the joyful moments I was to experience and treasure!

Newsflash! Those women who say that?  They’ve forgotten what it’s like and they’re in a perpetual state of “young child envy.”  The harsh, down-and-dirty reality is that this is going to be a pretty darn stressful time of your life, sister.  

And you might think your child is possessed.

I’m serious.  Deadly serious.  You’re going to be listening to this sweet, innocent little child turn into this shoe-throwing, head-butting, freaky-voice-using little brat kid.

You’ll pray, you’ll plead, you’ll consider medicating him, and you’ll think that you’re alone.  You’ll think your once sweet boy has been possessed by a nefarious demon and you’ll start googling exorcism and Holy Water.  In bulk.  Don’t be shocked, because if you haven’t already, you will be doing this.

How do I know?  Because today I was talking with an acquaintance, a sweet, lovely, smart, talented woman who is a great mom, and she was confessing that she was exhausted.  Her 2 year-old son wasn’t sleeping, he was behaving badly, and she was exhausted.  I reassured her that indeed this will pass.  And I shared that at one point we thought Ultra G was surely possessed, because he was creeping us out.

There was shocked silence and then a torrent of, “Oh, my gosh!  I was thinking that too!  He’s not himself!  He turns into this other….being!  I thought it was just him…just us…just something we had done or were doing or that somehow this was the way it was going to be forever!”

And it was in that moment of reassuring her and sharing that yes, something hormonally freaky happens with little boys around the age of 2, that I realized that this is the best kept secret in all of motherhood!  There should be books!  “Surviving the Scary Year” or “Possession to Perfection”.  Something that lets parents know that they.are.not.alone.

And odds are that their kid is not possessed.

Because as a parent, that reassurance right there, can mean the difference between investing in a drum of Holy Water and a good night’s rest.  Once you know you’re not alone, you stop worrying quite so much.

I didn’t have the heart to break it to my poor, sleep-deprived friend that Ultra G’s phase lasted for quite.some.time, but I did reassure her that it ended.  And thank God.  Because it was one of the freakiest, scariest, most unnerving behavioral times ever.  EVER.

But good news!  He wasn’t possessed.

2 thoughts on “Don’t Worry, Your Kid Is Not Possessed By A Demon.

  1. ha ha ha! just you wait until he hits 7yrs old . . . those hormones take over & whammy the 2yr old possession has nothing on this testosterone loaded phase (reliable sources say they return back to themselves briefly btwn 9-12 then disappear again into grunt-dom re-emerging around 17/18 if you are lucky). just as well we all love our little fellas to pieces or males would have died out years ago 😉

  2. Be glad you have a son. Girls are a million times worse during childhood. There is NO hormone phrase that briefly subsides between 9-12. There is only a hormone phase. Period. And it is never ending. They don’t re-emerge as well rounded angels around 17-18 (in fact, 17-18 is possibly the worst time). If you’re lucky you get your girls back in their 20’s. Though, I’m still waiting.

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